Corona Daily 156: BFF

Ilse Kohn and Anne Marie Wahrenburg were born in 1929, in Germany. After their first meeting in the school courtyard, they were inseparable. They shared a bench in the classroom, went to ballet class and synagogue together. Jewish girls were banned by the German government from playing in the parks, bicycling, visiting theatres or swimming pools. While their Aryan schoolmates went about freely, the two girls spent time in each other’s houses. The Nazi regime in a strange way bonded Ilse and Anne Marie closer.

In November 1938 the infamous Kristallnacht (night of broken glass) happened. Jewish homes, hospitals, schools were attacked, looted and demolished. In total 267 synagogues were destroyed. More than one hundred Jews were killed, 30,000 arrested and sent to concentration camps. Historians consider Kristallnacht as the starting point of the holocaust that murdered six million Jews.

Anne Marie’s father was arrested and sent to a concentration camp. Both girls were told it was too dangerous to live in Germany, and escape plans were hatched. In the spring of 1939, the girls met for the last time. Ilse’s family managed to buy tickets on a ferry to Shanghai. China took in Jews without visas. Ilse and Anne’s last meeting was traumatic. They promised to keep in touch, and meet again.

Ilse’s family fled to China. Except her parents and Ilse, everyone in the extended family was killed by the Nazis. In China, life was difficult, with not enough food, no medicines. Ilse got married and became Betty Grebenschikoff. Soon after, China had a communist revolution. Eight months pregnant, Betty had to flee again, along with her husband. The family finally settled in the USA.

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After that fateful day when they parted in Berlin, Betty never learnt anything about her friend Anne Marie. Whenever databases appeared, she looked for her friend. As a holocaust survivor, Betty gave speeches about her experiences and life in Nazi Germany.

In 1993, at the age of 63, Betty published a memoir (Once my name was Sara). It had an entire chapter devoted to Anne Marie and their friendship.

Steven Spielberg has founded the USC Shoah foundation which collects audiovisual testimony of holocaust survivors. Its archives have more than 55,000 video testimonies. In 1996, Betty recorded her testimony for four hours. In that interview she says: “I had one particular girlfriend whose name I always mention. Her name was Annemarie Wahrenberg. I never knew what happened to her…She probably died in the war but I’m not sure.”

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Ita Gordon is an indexer in this foundation. Organizing and cataloguing testimonies is her job. Last November, she was invited to attend a webinar hosted by the Latin American network for the teaching of the Shoah (Hebrew for holocaust). In normal times, the speeches happened in person, and there was no question of Ita attending a speech in Chile. But the pandemic had converted all lectures to webinars allowing anyone in the world to join. A 91-year-old survivor was telling the story of how her family fled Berlin for South America after the 1938 Kristallnacht pogrom. The Spanish speaker’s name was Ana Maria Wahrenberg. She mentioned her childhood friend Ilse Kohn.

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Ita, a professional indexer, with a phenomenal memory, sensed she knew a similar story, but didn’t know where or when. When she tried different searches with a variety of spellings, Wahrenberg appeared in a single four-hour interview from 1996. Ita sat listening to the interview, and heard: “I had one particular girlfriend whose name I always mention. Her name was Annemarie Wahrenberg.”

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Betty nee Ilse, 91, lives in Florida. Anne Marie, 91, lives in Santiago. On 19 November, they spoke on Zoom after a gap of 82 years. Ignoring the gap, they straightaway began talking in German, reminiscing. They spoke for over two hours.

Betty has five children, seven grandchildren and six great-grandchildren. Anne Marie has two children, six grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren. Most of them were mute spectators on that zoom call with eyes wet. Then they raised champagne glasses on their respective screens.

Betty and Anne Marie now connect on phone and zoom regularly. Anne Marie plans to visit Miami for Rosh Hashanah (in September).

“I just want to hug her again.” Says Betty. “It would be a culmination of a lifelong journey.”

Ravi